Summary of “24”: Episode 16 – 9 pm to 10 pm

Previously on “24”, we found out: If you ever have the misfortune to be arrested at CTU, you can just sit back and wait a while, and someone will end up proving your innocence; It’s important that if you’re going to set up tactical guys to shoot someone, you should put a couple on the other side of the street too; If you tell VP Noah something as simple as “I don’t want a cup of coffee”, it’s pretty likely he’s going to twist it into an excuse to bomb some unnamed country.

The following summary takes place between 9 pm and 10 pm:

9:00 pm – Lennox dials in the cable channel Secretary General TV, while the cabinet waits for the president to show up.

9:01 pm – Wayne really wants to stand up to Noah, just in case there’s a jump ball in the middle of the conference room, and he needs that edge. He asks the doctor for an injection so he won’t need a wheelchair.

9:02 pm – Jack calls Bill to tell him about Gredenko’s immunity deal offer to give up Fayed, but is concerned that Gredenko rolled over too easily. Bill says that’s because of the time Gredenko spent in the Russian circus disguised as a bear. Bill says that Wayne has regained consciousness, but VP Noah is challenging him under the 25th Amendment. Wayne has countered with a Black Lotus card, which VP Noah is still trying to figure out how to counter. Bill points out that if Fayed detonates another bomb, no one will be able to stand in VP Noah’s way. Jack points out that if Fayed DOES detonate another bomb, there probably won’t be anyone left standing anyway, and points out that if VP Noah takes over, the immunity deal will be off. Bill says that all this deal talk is beginning to sound like a Howie Mandel game show. Jack asks Bill to have the attorney general draw up the immunity deal papers, and Bill tells him the attorney general probably has a printer for that sort of thing.

9:04 pm – In the secret underground cabinet room, President Wayne finally arrives. VP Noah immediately goes to him, and lies like a dog: He says he’s happy to see Wayne. Lennox stands up and gives a little speech about the 25th Amendment in case we all didn’t get the drift the first couple of times they talked about it, and that he’ll be playing the role of Jeff Probst during tonight’s round of Presidential Survivor. Wayne’s doctor gets up and tells everyone that Wayne is doing pretty well, and everyone who didn’t say a darn thing when Noah was giving order to blow things up suddenly starts asking really hard hitting questions like: “Is Wayne OK?”, “Will he be able to shave his head without assistance?”, and “What show are we on right now?”. The doctor leaves, and Lennox asks Wayne to address the cabinet. Wayne says that instead of getting up and writing on a large piece of furniture, it would be a much better idea to talk to everyone. Wayne gives a speech and points out that Noah is a cry baby who just won’t give up if someone tells him “No”, and that’s the whole reason for all this “25th Amendment” talk.

Noah tells everyone that in order to make sure the constitution really works, from time to time they have to try out each and every one of the Amendments. Noah also says that the proof Wayne should be removed as President is that he DIDN’T want to bomb the snot out of another country. He also plays some really dramatic music after he gets done talking, which is blatantly unfair, but no one calls him on it because they’re all pretty scared of him. Lennox says that there will be a vote taking place in the next ten minutes, and that the person with the most votes will be asked to leave the presidential bunker immediately, unless they have an immunity idol.

Commercial

9:13 pm – At CTU, Milo asks Nadia about the vote. Nadia tells him that they’re still in commercial on Presidential Survivor, and that it’ll be a few more minutes. She asks that Milo forget about that whole silly “Nadia is a terrorist” thing. Milo says he won’t forget about the kiss though, and Nadia tells him that with breath like his she won’t be forgetting it soon either. As Milo leaves, Doyle calls Nadia and asks her to go upstairs.

9:14 pm – Nadia arrives upstairs, and Doyle makes a fumbling apology for smacking Nadia around earlier, because of the mole in the building. Nadia says that he should have called an exterminator, but Doyle ignores this and insists he’s not a racist. Nadia points out that he’s more of a sadist, and Doyle objects, saying he’s not any sort of “ist” at all. What he wants Nadia to do is to go check on Milo’s computer, to see if he’s the one that accidentally set up the wrong access protocols that let the terrorists break into the CTU computers and upload most of the files at CTU to Google. Nadia refuses, and Doyle tries to convince her that if she doesn’t help him, he’s going to bring in a forensics team, shoot Milo’s computer, tear it all up, and then haul Milo away in handcuffs – and not necessarily in that order.

9:18 pm – Karen sits down with Wayne and Sandra and asks what Wayne will do with Noah if Wayne ends up winning the vote. They want him out of the way and suggest getting him out of the bunker, perhaps even in an ark. Counting animals should keep him busy for a long time. Wayne says he can’t afford to alienate any of Noah’s supporters, because aliens are the last things they need to be dealing with right now. Wayne says that he’d rather keep an eye on Noah, so the ark is out too.

The cabinet comes back together, and Lennox calls for the vote without a secret ballet, since they’re in a hurry. The vote is seven to seven, which means that they have to turn to fire building, and the first person that can build a fire high enough to burn the twine and raise a little American flag gets to be president. The attorney general interrupts and says that since the majority of the cabinet didn’t vote to get rid of Wayne, he wins! Wayne gives the evil eye to seven people on the cabinet, many of whom are already working on the resumes on their laptops. Noah tells them to stop, because he doesn’t recognize Karen as the National Security Advisor! Lennox pulls out a photo album, and points to her picture, but Noah still doesn’t recognize her, so TADA! He’s president! He even says he’s really sorry to Wayne. Wayne says, “Pffft!” to that, and before a duel can break out, the attorney general suggests that they call Diana Ross and The Supremes to figure this thing out. An aide whispers something in his ear, and he corrects himself and says he really meant The Supreme Court. Wayne winces during the attorney general’s speech. As they leave the room, Noah tells Evil Lisa to get his affidavit started, and she says that she though he drove a Range Rover. Noah calls Lennox over and says that he thinks Lennox might not be on his side. Lennox says that’s true, he’s right in front of him, and he’s on the side of the United States of America, which is pretty tough because it’s a pretty big place.

Commercial

9:24 pm – Nadia goes over to tell Milo that her workstation is screwed up because the credentials on them were all wrong, and we all know what kind of hassle that can be. Milo goes off to fix this, and in about 10 seconds, Nadia is able to determine that the breach was Milo’s fault. She tells Doyle about this, and he fixes it so no one will find out about Milo’s screw up! Nadia looks surprised at this, and Doyle quotes from the Koran, which surprises her even more! Doyle says that he’s read the Koran, the Bible, the Upanishads, and even the Dave Barry Blog, but he still hasn’t come up with any answers to life’s greater meaning. Milo witnesses this from across the room, asks Nadia about it, but Nadia just says that she and Doyle were comparing data sets. Milo points out that in some engineering universities, comparing data sets means you’re engaged, but Nadia doesn’t hear him.

9:26 pm – Karen calls Bill, and tells him that the cabinet meeting went like the cabinet meetings usually go, but that this time Wayne won. Kind of. She explains about how Noah brought up the whole resignation thing, and that the last she heard Diana Ross was going to sing about it and decide something. She’s just worried that Noah will be unleashed on the world, but Bill assures her that they’ll be able to keep the muzzle on Noah and everything will turn out alright in the end. Karen tells Bill that there are arguments scheduled in 15 minutes. Bill says, “Wow! They really do schedule everything over there”. Karen tells Bill, “Thank you for being there”. Bill says, “Well, thank you for the Pink Panther.” Karen says that she has to get going, or she won’t get a good seat when Diana starts her show.

9:28 pm – Gredenko verifies with his attorney that the agreements have been signed, and that he’ll reimburse Jack for the amazingly large phone charge he’ll get on his Jack Phone next month. Jack lets Gredenko know that if he doesn’t get reimbursed, or that if he tells Fayed a thing about what’s going on, he’ll get out his Jack Gun and fill him with Jack Bullets.

9:29 pm – Gredenko calls Fayed and says he has the protocols. Fayed says they better be the right protocols, and not the ICMP protocols he tried to pass off last time. Grendenko says he’ll have to ping him about that later, and Fayed admonishes him for such a terrible protocol joke. Gredenko assures him that everything is ok, and they agree to meet at the Santa Monica Pier in about ten minutes. Gredenko wants to know where he’ll be found, and Fayed says he’ll find Gredenko. Jack talks to Bill, who says that Doyle is on his way to the pier, but won’t make it in time. Jack gets one of his tactical guys to put Gredenko in a “vehicle” which is Jack talk for “car”.

9:31 pm – Karen brings in the instructions from The Supremes, and they need the arguments written down and ready to go in ten minutes. Wayne says that Sandra is working on the briefs. Karen says that working on a new line of executive underwear is great, but what they really need is a written copy of arguments about why Wayne should continue to be president. Just writing down that Noah is homicidal maniac isn’t good enough. Sandra says that since Noah didn’t bring up the fact that Karen shouldn’t be there, that proves that Karen really still was acting National Security Advisor. Or acting like the National Security Advisor. Or an actor acting like the National Security Advisor. Something like that.

9:32 pm – Over in the evil half of the Presidential Bunker, Noah reads his briefs until someone hands him a set of papers with the argument on them and then he reads those. His argument is that he didn’t really MEAN to keep Karen; it’s just that he didn’t have a good evil replacement just at that moment. Evil Lisa doesn’t seem to think Noah’s chances are very good, and Noah says, “Then I am … deeply afraid for our country”. (I think it goes without say that with Noah in power, the country would be pretty afraid all by itself). Evil Lisa hatches a plan to swear that Noah told her to tell Karen that Noah had no intention of reinstating Karen. Noah points out that Lisa would be perjuring herself in front of the Supreme Court, and seems uncharacteristically reticent about the whole idea. Evil Lisa says that’s not what “perjure” means, and besides, the ends justify the means. Noah says that he never knew what that expression meant, but he’ll go along with her idea because she’ll get in trouble, and he won’t.

9:33 pm – Special delivery! Terrorist Express arrives, and they’ve got Fayed in the back, carrying metal suitcases, which are the universal television symbols for bombs. Halil (one of Fayed’s men) takes the cases and doesn’t want Fayed to go to meet Gredenko. Halil really wants to use the bombs right away (I think he must be distant cousins with Noah) because they can inflict a lot of damage right where they are. Fayed really wants to go for the gusto, and says that if his plan works, they’ll inflict damage across half of California, but he doesn’t say which half. They close the door on the Terrorist Express truck with Fayed in the back, and they leave.

9:35 pm – In the presidential bunker, Lennox goes to see Noah and asks to speak with him alone. Evil Lisa slinks out of the room. It turns out that Lennox bugged one of his own pieces of china in the room, and he has a tape of Evil Lisa and Noah talking about the perjury! Lennox tells Noah to call the Supremes and cancel the concert.

Commercial

9:41 pm – Wayne talks to Karen about what’s been going on since he’s been asleep. Wayne wants the launch codes, Fayed’s status, and someone to rename the “flesh colored” band-aid on his neck to something more appropriate. Sandra runs in to tell Wayne and Karen that during the commercial, the Supreme Court called and told her that Noah withdrew his suit. Karen says that’s an image that she won’t be able to get out of her head for a long time. Sandra says she meant the lawsuit that was filed. Everyone leaves, and Wayne picks up the phone to tell Melinda that he wants to talk to his doctor.

9:43 pm – Out in Santa Monica, Agent Ryan is fitting Gredenko with the latest in audio and isotope tracking gear. They’ll be able to track Gredenko within 15 miles. Hopefully this time they’ve figured out that they’ll need snipers on BOTH sides of the street during all this. It turns out that Doyle is about 20 minutes away, so Jack is going to have to run this operation himself, which I’m sure Jack can handle. They let Gredenko out of the nondescript CTU van with government license plates and Gredenko walks around looking for Fayed. A phone rings, and Gredenko picks it up. It is a cell phone that has a text message that says, “LOL! Go2 Building J”. They lose sight of Gredenko, so Jack goes to follow. A couple of guys grab Gredenko and bring him inside a building.

9:45 pm – Inside the building, Gredenko shows Fayed the transmitter. Fayed mistakes this for an iPod at first, but realizes it’s a transmitter, and he’s not happy. Gredenko tells him that Fayed needs to listen so they both get out alive, and Fayed says that since it’s not an iPod, he’s not sure out that’s going to work.

9:46 pm – Jack pulls his gun, enters the building but doesn’t see anyone. He looks around a bit more and finds Gredenko’s arm on the ground! Jack withholds his earlier vampiric tendency and doesn’t start chewing on it, but is able to use that same tendency to pick up the blood trail that Gredenko is leaving behind.

Commercial

9:52 pm – Jack continues to follow the trail and is so frustrated that Doyle isn’t there, he tells CTU to make Doyle set up a perimeter as soon as he gets there. Jack finally catches up, and there’s a lot of shooting. Jack says “Show me your head” to one of the bad guys, and he does, so Jack shoots him.

9:53 pm – An Arab and a one armed Russian walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, “What is this, some kind of joke?” (Sorry, and oldie but goodie). Gredenko really looks like he needs a drink. He’d be a great two… er, one-fisted drinker right now. As Fayed moves to the back of the bar, Gredenko loudly announces to everyone that Fayed is the guy they’re looking for. Fayed takes a couple of shots, runs out of bullets and some nice patriotic Americans start showing Fayed what they think of him by high-fiving him in the face with their fists. Gredenko escapes.

9:54 pm – Jack enters and starts shooting some completely innocent ceiling tiles, and says he’s talking Fayed. One of the guys in the bar says that his friend was shot, Jack says they’ll get him a doctor, and Fayed says that he hopes the friend is dead! Jack doesn’t like that kind of talk, so he boots Fayed in the face. Jack tells Bill that he has Fayed, and the tactical guys need to search for Gredenko, who’ll be the person that could audition for the remake of “The Fugitive”.

9:54 pm – Wayne is feeling really bad and asks the doctor to give him something to keep going. The doctor reluctantly agrees and gives him an injection. Wayne gets a call from Bill, who informs him that Jack caught Fayed.

9:55 pm – Down by the beach, Gredenko is under a pier stumbling along. It looks like he’s beginning to think that the whole “chopping off an arm” thing was a bad idea, and falls over, the ocean washing over him. I bet it’s the last time he tries THAT.

9:57 pm – Karen goes to Lennox and declares a truce. Karen asks about the whole “withdrawn suit” thing that Noah just did, and Lennox says he has no idea what happened, but would be happy to tell her all about it later. Lennox gets a phone call, and surprise! Now WAYNE wants to launch a strike!

9:59 pm – It turns out that Wayne is a maniac too, because that whole thing about wanting to be president wasn’t to stop the nuclear strike, it was just to regain his power. All that sympathy for Wayne everyone has been feeling just went up in smoke with the nuclear weapon he just launched at the STILL unnamed country.

10:00 pm – Time’s up! (And most importantly, NO AUDREY!)

NEXT TIME ON “24”: WAYNE TRIES TO KARATE CHOP A TABLE, BUT FAILS! JACK TRIES TO PUNCH FAYED AND SUCCEEDS! WAYNE FALLS OVER! TRUCKS COLLIDE! JACK GETS SHOT AND FALLS OVER, PRETENDING TO BE DEAD (WE HOPE!)

Lost – “Expose”

Spoilers ahead!

Some random thoughts about tonight’s episode, “Expose”:

That was quite an ending. Especially when Nikki opened her eyes while Sawyer and Hurley were filling the grave. What a gruesome way to die. Somehow I don’t think Locke’s advice to Paolo about “things don’t stay buried on this island”, will come true in this case, since they were buried in the graveyard above the high tide line. Sure was a quick way of getting characters nobody seemed to like.

Long time Lost Podcast fans: That’s probably as close to a zombie episode as we’ll ever see on the show.

I thought they did a pretty good job at stitching together footage from some of the earlier shows to show Nikki and Paolo interacting with everyone.

It was good seeing Boone and Shannon, but Nikki’s line of “I hope we don’t end up like them” was kind of like being hit over the head with a sledgehammer, and not your typical subtle foreshadowing.

The actor who plays Paolo (whose name escapes me at the moment) is referred to as “Tom Cruise of Brazil” by the writers, and in the show he was referred as the “Wolfgang Puck of Brazil”.

“The pigs are walking”, which Artz quotes, is a line from Animal Farm.

When Paolo is in the observation station, the conversation you can barely hear between Ben and Juliet while the enter the room is:

Ben: Who left this open?
Juliet: Tom was down here a couple of days ago.
Ben: Well, have him cover it up with the plane.

Question: After Paolo found that walkie-talkie…. Do you think he used it?

Any resemblence to “Bad Day” is purely…

Annie over on Dave Barry’s blog suggested “24 – The Musical”…

Apologies to …. well, everyone… for the following:

(Special apologies to Daniel Powter’s “Bad Day”)

This was the moment we needed you most
You hit the streets and the terrorists lost
Tony and Michelle, they passed away,
Even poor Edgar – he turned gray,
And everything seemed to be going wrong….

You’d stand in line just to hit Gredenko,
No bathroom in sight; when do you go?
One of the worst days in your life,
You’re shooting the thighs of everyone’s wife,
Jumping on planes with one carry on….

Cause you had a bad day,
You’re takin’ em down,
The streets are empty when you’re driving in town,
And Chloe will know,
You know she won’t lie,
But Curtis can’t drive when you go for a ride,
You had a bad day
Audrey might have died,
You could talk to Nadia,
But she’s got Milo on her mind,
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a CTU holiday,
The point is we’re happy you saved the day
And we don’t mean to carry on…

You had a bad day
You took ’em all down,
You called on your phone, and the bill weighs a pound,
You brought the drone in low,
Dropped it out of the sky,
You saved The Bay when you shot the bad guy,
You had a bad day,
Fayed will lie
But he’s really creepy and not a nice guy,
You had a bad day,

Sometimes the computers go on the blink and the plans just turn out wrong
But you know Chloe can get them back and beam right to your phone,
And we’re not wrong

We know you’ll be there when we need you the most
Even Edgar believes that, and he’s just a ghost

‘Cause you had a bad day,
You’re taking ‘em down,
Lennox says he doesn’t know,
Karen says that’s a lie,
They say you’re all done,
We hope that’s a lie,
You helped us a lot, and you’re our kinda guy,
You had a bad day,
We’ll call you again
And ask you to help one more time,
You had a bad day
But you saved the day

Summary of “24”: Episode 15 – 8 pm to 9 pm

Previously on “24”, we learned that: AUDREY IS DEAD! Well, she might be dead. Right now Jack thinks she’s dead, but it probably just means she faked her own death to get back at Jack for faking HIS death last season. It would just be like Audrey to get the nation’s hopes up like that, and turn around and show up just to torment us later.
In addition to that news, we also learned that Jack thought it would be Big Trouble if he blew up a nuclear weapon in San Francisco Bay, so he crash landed it instead. Oh, and Noah is a crazy person.

The following summary occurred between 8 pm and 9 pm:

8:00 pm – Jack tells the emergency crew working on the remote control drone pilot to be sure that he stays alive. Mike tells Jack about the teensy tiny problem of nuclear fallout, warns him not to step in anything that’s glowing, and runs off to see about the computers that were shot. One of the EMT guys tells Jack that the drone pilot was exposed to large amounts of PowerPoint slides on the computer he was using, and before he died he wanted to thank Jack for shooting him to end that misery. Jack calls Bill, and Bill tells him about Noah’s big plans to drop a nuclear weapon within the hour. They both decide it would be a good idea to find Gredenko before then.

8:02 pm – Gredenko works on his “Can You Hear Me Now” impression using his phone, but doesn’t have a phone plan that reaches the underworld, so he can’t reach the remote control drone pilot. Fayed is really upset that San Francisco is still San Francisco, and not the Nuclear Wasteland Formerly Know As San Francisco.

8:05 pm – Gredenko calls Mark, the guy he got the security codes from. Gredenko says that the last security codes just made all the garage doors in the neighborhood go up at the same time, and what he really needed was the access codes for the weapons. Mark hangs up, and feeds his mentally-challenged brother, Brady, who Mark is taking care of. It turns out that Brady has a rider in his contract just like rock bands, and he refuses to eat any red food. It turns out that he’s a real computer wiz too, since that’s how Mark got the security codes. Mark is one swell guy.

8:07 pm – Gredenko and Fayed leave in a completely inconspicuous dark car, and completely conspicuous U-Haul van.

8:08 pm – Milo is watching Nadia’s videos on YouTube, plotting how she can be TraitorGirl15, the next big viral video on the Internet. Bill says that Nadia is going to be tried as an enemy combatant. Bill says the proof is that she’s the only one in the whole world that could have possibly used her computer to stream information to Gredenko because everyone else in the entire world is completely aware of every single thing their computers do while they’re being used.

8:08 pm – Chloe calls Bill over and tells him that in an amazing plot development, that surprises everyone at CTU, they’ve already figured out that Mark is a traitorous weasel who has been helping Gredenko.

8:09 pm – One of Mike’s guys, Kyle, finding only a small plot device that was on remote drone pilot’s computer, figures out that Nadia is completely innocent of all charges against her. He springs into action and uses it to even the score with Mike for the mysterious “Denver” incident, whatever that is, and gives Mike the small plot device! Jack walks in, and it turns out the next guy they’re going to get to shoot is just a few miles away! This makes the second really, really bad guy very close to CTU in just two shows. Jack invites Mike to come along for all the shooting that’s about to happen, but Mike decides to stay behind, and gives that small plot device a great big squeeze.

Commercial

8:14 pm – In an effort to scare Wayne completely awake, Sandra is standing right by the window in case he wakes up even a little bit. Karen walks in and gives Sandra a big hug, frisking her for any long speeches she might have written for this occasion. Karen cuts the small talk, lets Sandra know about Noah’s crazy nuclear bomb ideas, and asks her to wake up Wayne. Sandra says that if she does that, they won’t know what state Wayne will be in when he wakes up. Karen says that she just wants him woken up, and that Wayne doesn’t have Hiro Nakamura’s abilities anyway, so there’s no chance he would just show up in a different state. Karen insists that Sandra needs to wake up Wayne, and asks WWWD? Sandra agrees to talk to the doctors.

8:16 pm – Back in the Planning Room of Death, Noah is getting a briefing on how to bomb a country that’s basically in the stone age back to the pre-stone age, and boy he’s excited about it. Lennox expresses his displeasure about that by making lots of faces and chewing on his pen, which everyone ignores. Evil Lisa comes in to hand Noah a note. Evil Lisa looks like she could be part of some weird invasion, so it’s probably good that Assad is dead, because he might have recognized her as an alien, since he had previous experience with that sort of thing. Anyway, the note says that Sandra’s about to wake up Wayne. Noah points at the note and says, “This is Karen Hayes”. Evil Lisa says, no, that’s a piece of paper. Noah calls the doctor.

8:18 pm – In Wayne’s room, the doctor gives Sandra and Karen the big news: Wayne’s condition is completely unchanged. The doctor takes a call from Noah. Noah’s gone completely paranoid and accuses the doctor of being in on “the plot” to subvert his policies. The doctor says that with all due respect, there hasn’t been a coherent plot for many hours now, and he doesn’t see that changing any time soon. The doctor finally tells Noah, “You’re not the boss of me”. Noah responds to this by telling the doctor he’s going to nail something unmentionable here on a family blog to a wall, and hangs up.

8:21 pm – Outside Mark’s House of Espionage, Jack’s got a positive ID on Mark, so they go in shooting. This completely freaks Brady out. Jack’s seen Rain Man fifty-seven times, so he’s the one that goes in to talk to Brady. Brady tells Jack that he’s trying to get through a firewall and setup a proxy server port. Jack’s reaction is EXACTLY the same as when Chloe tells him that sort of thing: He gets a glazed look on his face and says, “Oh”. Jack goes over to talk to Mike. Mike says he’s been selling security specs on a nuclear power plant to Gredenko.

8:23 pm – Mike and his second in command arrive at CTU, where they tell Bill that all the computers were “all complicated and stuff”. Mike asks about Nadia, and Bill tells him that she’s in a holding facility. Bill asks Mike why he wanted to know that, and Mike makes up an excuse that he might want to ask Nadia out for a date, but Bill ignores this. Milo comes up to tell Bill that Jack is on the phone. Jack informs Bill they’re going to use Brady to try and catch Gredenko when he comes to get the information about the power plant.

Commercial

8:28 pm – Jack brings Brady to Mark. Mark tells Brady to do whatever Jack wants him to do, and that Jack will take care of him. Mark calls Gredenko and tells him that Brady will have the security specs in the parking lot across the street, but neglects to tell him that Jack will be there with him with a large gun.

8:32 pm – Mike’s second in command who we learn is named Kyle. Kyle turns out to be an especially sleazy weasel, because he tells Milo that Mike has evidence that Nadia is completely innocent! Milo tears off his own arm sling, which he has been using to get sympathy from everyone, and pushes Milo around. In several plot twists that take place within about 10 seconds, it turns out that Mike gave Morris the small plot device. Bill says this is all very confusing, and finds it weird that there are so many people here that have names that start with letters in the middle of the alphabet. He suggests that people with names at the beginning of the alphabet are cool too, but everyone ignores him when Morris points out that the small plot device is real. Bill tells everyone to get back to work, and Milo apologizes to Mike for nearly letting Mike kill him with his bare hands.

Commercial

8:38 pm – Bill has Nadia uncuffed. He tells her that they found evidence that her workstation had been breached, and that she’s clear. She says that she’s actually opaque, and gets up to leave. Bill immediately starts using his mind powers to tell her what she’s thinking: That she’s going to quit and take legal action, but that she wants her to stay because they really need people to stay until the end of the season.

8:40 pm – Milo’s working on Nadia’s workstation when Chloe comes over to point that that Milo has a crush on Nadia. Nadia comes over and tries to point out that CTU isn’t the best place to start a relationship, what with all the gas canisters and shootings that tend to happen around there. Milo counters this with a very awkward to watch kiss. Even the camera guys had to pull back and show them from across the room. It was that awkward.

8:42 pm – Back at Wayne manor, Karen found the time to go get a half double decaffeinated half-caf with a twist of lemon for herself and Sandra. Sandra says she doesn’t like waiting, but recognizes that a lot of exciting stuff happens near the top of the hour, so she says she’ll have to wait. Sandra says that David Palmer had the patience of Job, and Karen tells her that she didn’t realize Job was a doctor. Sandra says, “Patience, not patients!”, but Karen ignores this when the doctor comes in. The doctor says that there has been some intracranial swelling, and if this continues, Wayne will get brain damage, and become a writer for “The Simple Life”. Sandra decides to take a chance and tells him that they need to wait, to see if they can keep Noah from carrying out his evil plan. In some impeccable timing, Wayne makes his machine go ping, which causes the doctor and nursing staff start looking around for some junior mints to see if that will help. One of the nurses makes a phone call to get a team of doctors into Wayne’s room, because they’re occupied with other REALLY important patients elsewhere.

8:44 pm – Jack consults with one of his tactical guys about what to do with Brady. Jack gives Brady one of the new microscopic iPods and puts it into Brady’s ear so that he and Brady can communicate. They go outside to meet with Gredenko. Jack sets up a perimeter with lots of tactical guys, but doesn’t have to call it a perimeter, because he’s Jack.

8:46 pm – Brady waits across the street from his house, and one of the tactical guys has his radio on MUCH too loudly. Jack looks like he wants to shoot him, but Gredenko drives up, so that’ll have to wait. Gredenko gets out of the car, and suddenly everyone realizes they’ve set up all the tactical guys on the wrong side of the street because no one has a clear shot at Gredenko. Brady gives Gredenko a USB drive. While Gredenko downloads the information into his laptop, he proves he’s a complete jerk by telling his men to shoot Brady as soon as the information is done downloading. Jack hears this, and tells Brady to hit the ground as soon as he can. The information gets done downloading, and Gredenko gives the order to kill Brady. After a tense moment where Brady doesn’t immediately hit the ground, he finally does, just in time for Gredenko to receive a new feathery ornament right in the neck. Lots of people get shot, including someone that’s still in the car. (Jack called dibs on that one, and shot him as soon as he got out). Brady, fortunately, is OK. The tactical guys drag Gredenko inside the house.

Commercial

8:53 pm – Jack gets Brady into a car to go see Mark at the hospital. As Jack goes in to talk to Gredenko, one of the tactical guys asks “Do you need help with him?” Jack mumbles, “You must be new here”, and then declines.

8:54 pm – Jack asks Gredenko, “Do you know who I am?” Gredenko tells Jack that he knows all about him, because they get “24” in Russia too, only there it’s called “Man Who Will Shoot You in the Thigh”. Jack threatens to do some nasty interrogating and then send Gredenko back to Russia, so Gredenko readily admits where the next target is. In return, he wants amnesty, a promise he won’t be sent back to Russia, and guarantee that Sanjaya will be off American Idol this week. This apparently stuns Jack, because he’s starts to go into a one-sided staring contest with Gredenko, who continues to just babble away.

8:56 pm – Back in Noah’s planning room, Lennox brings Noah some very bad news: Jack has Gredenko in custody. At least, Noah considers this bad news, but decides, what the heck, since they’re already in the neighborhood, the nuclear strike should continue. Lennox tries to argue with him, but Noah says that the special effects guys have been ready to go for a long time now, and he doesn’t want to disappoint them.

8:58 pm – Just as the commander calls to give the order, it turns out that the fleet already has orders… from President Wayne! The phone rings, and its Wayne calling for Noah! Wayne tells Noah that there is to be no launch today, and hangs up on Noah.

8:59 pm – Noah takes this opportunity to point out that Wayne must have been kidding about the “don’t bomb” thing, doesn’t want Wayne to remain in power, and asks to talk to the attorney general! Noah’s going to try and get Wayne out of the way!

9:00 pm – Time’s up!

NEXT TIME: WAYNE IS BACK, FIGHTING FOR HIS JOB! EVIL LISA ADVISES NOAH! BILL STATES THE OBVIOUS ABOUT THE BOMBS! JACK IS ITCHING TO SHOOT GREDENKO! LOTS OF SHOOTING!

Smoke Monster vs. “The Box”

spoilers ahead

I’d been running under the assumption that The Smoke Monster is something that has been manifesting itself as various people and creatures this whole time, but now I have to wonder.

If Locke’s father really popped out of “The Box” Ben was talking about, did Kate’s horse too? What about Jack’s Dad, when Jack saw him? (I’m not sure I’m ready for Jack’s Dad, the Zombie version).

Or was this all the smoke monster? The episode where Eko died had his brother running around, and shortly afterward he ended up dying because of the smoke monster.

Any thoughts on this? Smoke monster? The Box? Something else?